absolutely sick

Not sure how to write about this or how much to write about this but this weekend I had alot of money go missing from my wallet. $220 possibly $240. Why did I have that kind of cash on me? Laziness. Pure unadulterated laziness. It was child support and rent money. It should have been deposited on Friday. Then there was also money missing from my jewelry box. $60. So all in all apprx $300 is gone. You can only imagine how the bottom of my world just opened up and swallowed me whole.

I was crazy trying to figure how and who. Did I misplace it? Did I lose it? Who could have stolen it? Who had opportunity? WHo would have done it? There were only three people who had opportunity. My daughter, her friend who spent the night and my roommate. My roommate had a sliver of opportunity but the 2 girls had a much wider slice of opportunity. I questioned Sarah and she asked her friend. Of course they both denied it. I was letting it go, chalking it up as a lesson learned about being more diligent about my purse, when I got PISSED. No Way!! THis is my frigging house where this happened and I wanted to know what happened. Then I got worried. If it was Sarah or her friend, why in the world would they need that kind of money? Anyways, after consulting a friend who is in law enforcemment, I decided to really press Sarah for answers. I had to reach one of 2 conclusions. I had to either find out about my money or be convinced that she had nothing to do with it.

Last night about 9pm we sat down. Face to face. She was told that she would not be going anywhere or doing anything until I got to the bottom of it. And it started. I knew my tactic was always going to be to give her an out and to always let her know that I love her no matter what. I offered to not seek charges if I just know the truth. I appealed to her sense of loyalty. I didn't allow her to split hairs by saying she didn't have the money. I know she doesn't have it. I knew she didn't take it, but I had a strong suspicion that she had knowledge of it. I explained that difference and how the law doesn't care, she would be just as guilty.

She finally gave me what I needed. She finally got pissed and said that she was mad that someone took money from me but that she was more pissed that I thought it was her. She got mad and very adamantly said she didn't have it. Didn't know anything about it. That she never has and never would steal from me. I finally saw the truth in her eyes. And truthfully I was never so relieved. I don't know where my money is and I will never get it back but I'd rather have the trust in my daughter and know she didn't do it than have the money back and know that she did. That would have killed me, even though I know kids, people make mistakes.

I don't know if her friend snuck it out of my purse but I do know that she couldn't have taken the money in the jewelry box. Either way I have banned any friends from coming over when I'm not home and there won't be any for awhile even when I am there, considering the money from my wallet happened while I was there. It had to have. I do have to reconsider my roommate. It's really a tough situation. I have been too free with information about myself. My hiding places and leaving my purse open on the counter.

I'm done accusing and moving on. I have no choice. I have nothing definitive against any of them and who knows, someone could have come in and taken the money from the jewelry box. I do think the wallet and the jewelry box are connected but I can't prove it. I don't even have a strong gut feeling on it. I find it hard to comprehend that any of them would purposely hurt me like that.