He's married. And not to Deb.

I have to admit I was a bit shocked but it doesn't bother me nearly as much as I would imagined.

I have always been right about him. Always. I always knew he wouldn't chose me. I just wanted him to real bad. I always knew I loved him far more than he ever did or ever would love me. I knew he wouldn't marry Deb and I knew that when he and her split there would already be someone new in the picture. I always knew it would never be me. I have always known he was fickle. I have always known he is a serial cheater.

I wish this ever knowing had been easier to see and accept. I wish I hadn't wasted so many years and tears. But it wasn't and I did. It is what it is.

I found out by accident. It was like a punch in the stomach. Sort of. But I haven't cried. I am happy where I am and who I am with. I wouldn't trade that for a million "hey baby"s from him. I just didn't expect him to marry. I hope for her sake that he behaves. I hope for both their sakes that he can be happy with her. I'm glad for my sake that I never have to deal with that concern.

PS..I have no idea what happened to Deb. I do feel bad for her and I only hope that it was she who came to her senses and booted him out.